The Jewish Week printed an article about my Rav, Rav Aharon Bina. Unfortunately, it is not a positive article.
I would like to respond to this article here because I feel that my short response, buried in the second page of the comment section, was ineffectual amidst all the other voices trying to be heard there.
I chose Rav Bina to be my posek because I have never met a man so open and honest. What he feels, he says. This applies to his opinions of people as well as his vast Halachic knowledge. I love knowing that he will always be up front with me when I ask him anything.
When I was told that it was financially impossible for me to return to Yeshiva for a second year, Rav Bina offered to accept me free of charge.
He bent the rules so I could go to family friends on Rosh HaShanna (a night when NO student is allowed out of Yeshiva) because he knew the family. He knew that they were close-to-poverty poor, and wanted them to have whatever gift I would be bringing them. He even gave me money to get them a thank-you gift afterward. I later found out that this was one of many families Rav Bina assisted financially without their knowledge.
On another "in" Shabbat (when all boys have to be in Yeshiva), Rav Bina once again let me out when my mother asked for special permission to have me be with her. She was visiting from the US and wanted to spend her one Shabbat in Israel with her son. Despite his reputation as a strict follower of his own rules, he let me go. Ever since my mother's murder, that Shabbat has even more meaning for me. Rav Bina let me spend that much more time with her.
I discussed my life with him. He let me into his home late into the night just so he could listen to whatever I'm-18-so-whatever-problems-I-have-are-monumental issues I had to vent. And he didn't only do this for me; he did it for any of his boys that wanted to talk to him. Almost 24 hours a day for a whole school year he was there for me.
When my mother was killed, Rav Bina was at the funeral even though I hadn't seen him in six years. He held me while I cried into his shoulder. He came back numerous times during the week of Shiva, despite the many other things he certainly had to do.
He officiated at my wedding. He didn't want any payment or even any under-the-table tip. He said I could donate some money to the Yeshiva if I felt like giving any money. Because he was doing it it for me, not the money. If money was to be given, it should be for his boys instead of himself. That's just who he is. He even gave us a lovely silver Kiddush cup that I'm proud to use at my Shabbat table.
Every year I pray with Rav Bina on Yom Kippur. I wake up before the crack of dawn so I can be in the Minyan HE leads. And in the nine years I've been doing so, he's never charged me for my seat. In return I've offered to lead the Yeshiva's tours free of charge, but he insists on making sure I get paid each time.
I'm not going to bring up the negative things said about him in the article, because I don't think they deserve acknowledgement.
He's my Rav, and I owe all that I am to him.
Consider that when you hear or read anything negative about him.
I read the article and read this. I'm not very involved in the yeshiva world... But it was encouraging to read about your relationship with Rav Bina. Just another important lesson that
ReplyDeleteeverything runs deeper than it seems.
all rabbis are human and while rav bina is an amazing comfort and source of inspiration for you it is undeniable that some of his teaching "methods" cause undue harm to some students in his yeshiva.
ReplyDeleteMany abusive people are also very charismatic, and even caring to those that they favor. This does not mitigate their abusive treatment of the unfortunate few. Part of the phenomenon is knowing who is vulnerable.
ReplyDeleteSomehow, I just came upon this now, and I couldn't agree more. He has stayed in my parents' home many times. I have eaten with him more times than I can count, and even helped babysit his kids. When my sister showed up at yeshiva last year unannounced, not only did he make time for her immediately, he spent over an hour with her, as thought she was the most important person in the world. There are many, many generosity stories that I recall. I, too, attended Shana Bet for free. But one sticks out, which I think is a great example of his rules and kindness halves. Shana alef, Rav Bina told me I had to get my hair cut (it was long, and apparently not nearly as nice as yours). I told him it wasn't really in my budget to pay for any kind of decent haircut, so he gave me the money, paid for the cab, and as a consolation prize, gave me money for lunch that day. Obviously, its not all about the money, but he understood that this was a difficult thing for an 18 year old with longish (and, if I say, nice) hair, and he made it as easy as he could. And when I went back to yeshiva after college, I had my goatee, which is against yeshiva rules. I was 22, and I told him that I did not feel comfortable without it, and didn't want to possibly start dating without it. Ridiculous? Perhaps. But he understood the situation, let me keep it, and stood up for me all year.
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